Broken Innocence
by Whimsical Fern
Summary: She never expected that being violated would feel so good. Drabble. Count/Haydee. Rated for a reason...8P


I've always wanted to use that for a title…8P *drool* Yet another drabble from me. Reviews are very much welcome. :) Rated for a reason (I just want to play it safe for now).

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_If anyone violates or dishonors you..._

_Remember..._

_...Kill yourself!_

The same words, the same image of her dying mother had forever haunted her mind ever since the poor soul could remember. With tears blurring the final mental image of Vasiliki Tebelin, Haydee, even as a girl of only four years, had sworn to keep the promise she kept to her mother sacred. She held it close to her heart, unconsciously holding the relic of her late father to her bosom at the same time.

Whatever fate would bring to her, an abandoned princess, orphaned and completely devoid of self-esteem, she would end her life the very moment someone would take away her purity and innocence.

She, of course, had not realized that being violated would feel so good.

Having just experienced the most blissful, most heavenly moment of her life, Haydee sought comfort and shelter in the cold arms of her master. In contrast to the icy feel of his bare skin, Haydee felt hot, from her face to her entire body. She even felt tired; such an ordeal would bring anyone's heart to an accelerated pace, regardless of sex, intentions or composure. The moistness between her legs was still present, only one of the many results of their exhausting intercourse.

The Count of Monte Cristo, of all people. She never thought it would be him, her lord, her master, her superior. He had wanted for it to happen, and so it did. They had united, intimately and emotionally, in his dark sanctum, his only place of solitude. Only then did she understand the meaning behind her mother's warning.

True, she had felt scared; it was like nothing she had ever expected. True, the experience left her confused and full of alien thoughts. True, it made her fear the Count even more than before. But something had happened during the intercourse that had briefly emptied her mind of all possible worries and forebodings.

The trails of kisses left across her body, the feel of his cold fingers upon her face, the warm, relatively new tenderness she had found in his eyes: these paled in comparison to the feeling of being sexually united with him. It had seemed like an endless spell of newfound pleasure to her until the finale arrived. Too suddenly, she had been flooded with unbearable bliss and torture, enough to make her cry out loudly and bring unexpected tears to her eyes.

She felt neither violated nor defiled.

Instead, she felt...whole.

Now, still in bed, she looked upon her love, the only person who had given her a deeper meaning of paradise, with an expression of infinite admiration and amazement. She placed a hand on his cheek and slowly kissed his brow. Ordinarily, he would be the one planting tender kisses upon her forehead, a sure sign of his fatherly authority over her, but it seemed that the moment they had shared together had left them as equals. In bed, at least.

She loved this man with all her heart. She felt absolutely no ill feelings toward him. Throughout a part of her childhood and the whole of her adolescence, she felt admiration for his courage and perseverance, sorrow for his pains and losses, and an extraordinary sense of affection for his daily gestures of warmth and tenderness. All of these were more than enough for her.

Only one question remained unanswered.

She had to honor the promise she had made to her mother. Without honor, the poor girl would live a life without meaning or purpose. She would live a slave, and die a sinner.

Slowly, she rose from his bed, still grasping onto her father's knife. Strangely, she felt lighter. Along with the fact that the experience had left her light-headed, feeling unclothed made her freer, free enough to choose without any sort of weight upon her mind or her body pinning her down.

Haydee held on to the sheath of the blade nervously. A lifetime of love and bliss, or no lifetime at all?

Two cold hands upon her shoulders surprised her, but she hardly flinched. She did not retaliate as she felt his arms gently constrain her own arms in front of her. Slowly, so slowly that it brought her near tears, the action turned into an embrace. Before she knew it, Haydee started crying uncontrollably in the Count's arms.

She didn't want their time together to end abruptly. She felt no shame or dishonor in offering herself to him. But most of all, she did not wish to leave the Count for good. She knew that such a separation would cruelly tear him apart, body and soul, and hurting the Count would be the last thing she would ever do...

One kiss from him put a stop to her mental ramblings, and soon, they made love again. The same feeling of emptiness washed all traces of betrayal and shame from her, and she felt peace once more.

Ever since then, she never gave the vow a second thought. She knew that by living a chaste, free life with the person she cherished the most, she was fulfilling the promise of attaining true happiness to her mother, and so much more.

Later that night, somehow, Haydee felt her mother's loving eyes watching her from above, or maybe it was just the wind.


End file.
